A hug from God

Don't judge me. I am a guy and I like hugs. :)

Last week was just one of those weeks. It wasn't bad, but neither did it go well...

I still struggle with managing my classroom sometimes and that was one of those weeks. Besides school challenges, it was also a time when I really felt like God was trying to teach me patience and humility through various happenings during the past days. (Oh, by the way, never ask God to teach you things like that if you're not completely serious, because God is just waiting to honor such requests). :)

Anyway, finally it was Friday when I could sit down in the afternoon and get some rest. I had a conversation with a good friend of mine and tell them about some of the things that had happened. I was able to rant for a while and let off some steam. Everyone needs to do this sometimes--it's really therapeutic! In addition, I was also to receive a lot of sound advice and encouragement to keep going at it and do my best.

But of course, the very best way to get alleviate stress is to go to the One who knows everything. No matter how many times I mess up, He is always there ready to forgive and listen to my problems, struggles, pain, etc., etc.

As I prayed, it felt like all that garbage in the form of stress, fear, and other weights began sliding off. It felt wonderful! But that was not the end...

I reached for my Bible, opened it, and started reading Psalms 137 which was where the pages fell...

How shall we sing the Lord's song in a strange land...

Though the Lord be high, yet hath he respect unto the lowly...

The Lord will perfect that which concerneth me: thy mercy, O Lord, endureth for ever...

...thou understandest my thought afar off...

For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O Lord, thou knowest it altogether...

Thou hast beset me behind and before, and laid thine hand upon me...

If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there. If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea; even there shall thy hand lead me...

...marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well...

Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts: and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting...

Of course, these verses were all in Spanish, but somehow that just made them seem all the more wonderful. I was overwhelmed! It seemed like God was saying "I know how you feel, but I'm still here. Listen to this... and this... and this...". Out of all those verses, the third one (Psalms 138:8) was the one that stuck out the most and has become one of my favorite verses. I see it pretty much every day now...

And that is how I experienced what I call a "hug from God". The purpose of this post is to glorify God for His goodness. Please don't leave thinking "poor Sam, he has such a hard life being a missionary in another country". Just...no! Instead, thank God for the many times he has answered prayers--both mine and yours! And keep praying for me if you think about it. Your prayers really do make a difference.

And maybe the secondary purpose would be to encourage YOU as well. Are you feeling down in the dumps? Not sure where to turn? Feel like your many responsibilities are crushing you?

God is willing to hear you. Your experience might not be as dramatic as was mine this time, but God will listen if you are sincere. God is always there, my friend...

Pray for Carlos

This is Carlos...

He hasn't had the easiest of lives. Actually, who am I kidding, I bet 95% of the people reading this haven't had to go through close to what he has experienced.

Carlos was actually born as José Luis, but we didn't discover that until last year. If I remember right, his mother died when he was really young which left him in the care of his drunken father. His "father" was naturally more concerned about his next drink, so Carlos was left to himself a lot. As a little tyke, he was found on the streets by government officials who eventually transferred him to Hogar Torre Fuerte (Strong Tower Children's Home) without much knowledge of his real father and mother (both of whom have died by now).

Of course, being an orphan is extraordinarily difficult for anyone, but doubly so for a deaf child like Carlos. At the children's home, he was given food, clothing, and shelter, but he often found it difficult to communicate with anyone. With the exception of a few people who took extra time to learn sign language, he had few friends who could understand all of what he tried to say. This coupled with Carlos' extreme stubbornness and issues with deceitfulness, made life very difficult for both him and his caretakers.

During the week, Carlos was able to come to the deaf school where there were other deaf children like him, but here too, people (myself included) often weren't sure how to deal with him. As an orphan, Carlos had learned to fend for himself, and so it was a constant struggle to submit his will to others.

At the end of last year at the age of 16, Carlos decided to leave the children's home, so he packed his things and said goodbye. Unfortunately for Carlos, because of his decision to leave the children's home, he was then not permitted to come to the deaf school, either. While I would have treated Carlos' situation differently, I think God has used Carlos' time out of school to help him appreciate more what all he has been blessed with.

During his time on the streets (again), he has often had to sleep under the stars or in the rain. He has made enemies, been beat up and nearly killed by people he angered, and generally had a rough life. But since school started, he has started coming around more to CICS and even to church. He isn't allowed to come to CICS whenever, but he usually comes around Thursdays to chat and ride unicycles.

I have always tried to show him love no matter what anyone else says or does by shaking his hand and putting my arm around him whenever I get the chance.

Anyway, these last months have shown a changed Carlos. The anger is gone, replaced by a constant smile. He has come around numerous times now and has never taken so much as a penny as far as I can tell. He always listens to and respects the people here. He attends church pretty faithfully, Wednesdays included.

Last Sunday evening, he came to church when we had singing and testimony time. For his testimony he expressed a desire to follow God and to grow in his spiritual life. He has said that before many times, but I believe he meant it this time.

Later, someone asked Carlos if he wanted to give his life to Christ and he acknowledged that he did! A small group of us went somewhere private and talked to him for a while about what that means. He confessed the things he had done in the past and asked God for forgiveness. He told God he would give his whole life to him.

All told, it was not a huge, emotional affair and we didn't hear angels singing or anything like that. And I admit I doubted that it was genuine this time and that he really understood what it all meant. (God help my unbelief!) But I believe it was real and I believe God and his angels were rejoicing. Many, many people have prayed and are praying for Carlos, and I believe this is the first step for him. Numerous prayers have been answered, and I pray that many more will come to fruition.

So please pray for this teenager. Pray that God would reveal Himself to Carlos in a powerful way. Pray that God would provide us with wisdom so that we could help and encourage Carlos. Pray that God would protect Carlos from all the evil all around him.

May we meet in heaven someday...

God at work

These last two weeks have gone very well, and I can't thank my Heavenly Father enough for that. There's so many happenings these last two weeks to tell y'all about, but let me try...

First of all, remember that post where I asked y'all to pray that I could have more wisdom in the area of teaching my students correctly? Well someone was praying because that week went just amazing! God answered prayers above and beyond, and I believe is constantly showing me that He is still there even though I seem to forget at times.

Anyway, so I've always tried to have a disciplined classroom, right? I tried to keep my students well-behaved and respectful. Sometimes this meant watching what they're doing to make sure they're not misbehaving, or even cracking down when they misbehaved. However, sometimes I forgot that they aren't little kids like my previous students were (I still have to remind myself of that sometimes) and it seemed like my approaches were almost achieving the opposite result. Sure they obeyed, but it didn't seem like they did it out of respect, but rather out of fear (big difference). And as soon as I wasn't around or had my back turned all kinds of things happened.

At the beginning of last week I decided to let my students have a little more freedom, just to see what would happen. Of course, that didn't mean I let them do whatever I want, but I showed them that I trusted them by letting them do more on their own without me looking after them. Another thing I started doing was praying regularly for each of my students, sort of like that elderly man in Facing the Giants that prayed over each student as he went down the row of lockers. This, especially, has helped me to focus more on my students as unique creations of God in need of a Savior just like me, instead of only seeing performances on homework and tests.

It's been a real learning experience this year, but I thank God for the way he has answered many prayers, and for the way he has been teaching me through my students. I've learned so much from them already. And I can see they have been learning as well.

Two of my students especially--Paola and Eduardo--have been making great strides recently. Eduardo has been studying more on his own. Recently he had been struggling with the Bible verses we've been learning, so he buckled down and practiced in his spare time. On his last test, he was able to do much better than before. His attitude also shows much more happiness and eagerness to learn than before, probably partially because of the way the girls have started to egg him on. I told the girls the other day, that whenever they see Eduardo say "I can't", they have to immediately stop him and say that "he can!". :)

Paola has struggled to fit in with the rest of my class, through really no fault of her own. Teresa and Beatriz are best friends, so they hang out a lot, but Paola gets forgotten sometimes. I think this makes her feel inferior, so she doesn't always do her best in school. Recently, however, her amazing smile has returned and she has attacked her school work with vigor. She has been studying her vocabulary words and doing much better in general.

Beatriz and Teresa are also doing very well. Teresa does a very good job of being example to all of the girls by being respectful, kind, and doing her best in everything (well, except in Math, which she hates). I'm still working on her in that area. :) Beatriz still has her brilliant smile and light-hearted spirit which I so admire, knowing the home she comes from each weekend.

So yeah, that is some of what has been keeping me smiling these last two weeks. God has been really answering prayers and I can't thank Him enough. But, of course, we all know that Satan never stays away, so I pray that God would continue teaching me and helping me to do my best at fighting the good fight!

And speaking of Satan's attacks--please pray for Paty and Liz also. While school has been going well for me the last while, it hasn't always been so much fun for them, in fact I'm sure they would say it was very discouraging at times.

Paty teaches the class I had last year--Joel, Miguel, and Jairo. Miguel especially has been causing a lot of trouble lately for Paty. Miguel is such an adorable little youngster, but due to a lack of discipline at home, he has a lot of trouble with respecting authority, especially when he gets a new authority. For a few weeks now, he has been constantly trying to see how much he can get away with and just outright disobeying whenever he gets the chance. I know how this feels, because I dealt with the same thing when I first started teaching him last year, and it isn't fun. Day after day, it seems like nothing you do helps, and you end the day drained of all your energy.

Liz's two students--Maria and Antony--are the oldest and youngest students, respectively. Maria is very intelligent, does very well in school and always has a ready smile. She is good friends with my students and hangs out with them every chance she gets.

Antony is a bit of a different story, however. When he shows up at school which has been about 3 days per week (grrr) he has such a hard time focusing. He is all smiles, loves to tell stories, and plays with the other boys at recess time, but when it's time to listen to what teacher says he just can't. He knew the numbers 1 through 10 at the end of last year, but hasn't been able to get beyond that this year yet. He has such difficulty with doing any work on his own--Liz almost always has to help him in order for him to get anything done. The last few days have been much better, though. Here's praying and hoping that it continues!

Please pray for all of us as we do our best to teach these youngsters about academics, but also, and most importantly, how to walk the "Jesus trail". Pray for wisdom as we strive to model Jesus' teachings to all these young, pliable souls.

Oreo! Need I say more? :)

Teresa drew this picture representing what she did on the
weekend. Looks like she was helping Ana (her sister)
make tortillas.

Elmer and I at a restaurant on a volcano, where we all went
last weekend for a beautiful view and delicious pupusas!

Joel pretending to be a fish and "swimming" on
the hammock.

Mary paid us a visit from Mexico! Needless to say, she was the center of
attention.

Antony "preaching" to all his eager and ready listeners.

Relaxation when Teacher Sam has
run out of things to say. :)

Miguel practices riding the unicycle every chance he
gets. He can actually ride a few feet without any help.

Well that's... interesting. :)

Tug-of-war except more complicated. Fall off and you lose!

Liz and Paty going at it. Looks like Liz is about to lose!

A busy vacation

Last week (March 21-25) was Semana Santa, or literally translated, "Holy Week" which is widely celebrated in Central America. In El Salvador, schools and some other places are closed the entire week.

Which meant we got a week of vacation! I use the term "vacation" pretty loosely there, because I actually didn't spend a ton of time relaxing during the week. I, along with the help of some of my coworkers, actually got a pile of work done. Such a satisfying feeling. Don't get me wrong, though. I didn't go the entire week without relaxing--that would just be, well, not vacation at all!

To kick things off we decided to have ourselves an extra long weekend and stay at the AMA guest house in San Salvador. Nata thoughtfully offered to drive us with the school van, so we happily rode along with enough luggage to stay till Monday. Paty and Verónica had gone to their homes for the week, so they weren't able to come along.

We had a glorious, relaxing weekend with absolutely nothing to do. On Saturday we went to Metro Centro, a large mall, where Elmer and I passed out Antorchas de verdad (Seed of truth) magazines to all the passers-by and did some exploring, while Liz and Bethany did some exploration of their own. 

While there, I saw a sight that again reminded me of our tendency to get sucked into pretty much anything competitive, no matter how stupid it is. Elmer and I were walking when we came upon a large crowd in the mall jostling around this tall, glittery machine with the words Key Master plastered on top. Inside the machine were a bunch of expensive prizes and all you had to do was maneuver a key into a hole to get one. There was a lever for left and right and a button that you had to hold in until you thought it was at the right place vertically, after which the key would slowly move forward. Each attempt cost a dollar, and every time someone tried, they were so close to achieving their goal. Of course, right?! 

The rest of time until Monday we spent taking advantage of the speedy wifi, playing Rats, talking with family, eating and rejoicing in the fact that we had a whole week ahead of us yet. :)

Corn hole, nice grass, cool air, and a whole week of
adventure ahead!

After we had arrived at CICS on Monday afternoon, unpacked, and unwound a little, Elmer and I started on a project we had been planning for some time--organize the giant mess in the spare school room. Our ideas was to build a giant cabinet to store all the school things which up until now had been scattered throughout since there was no one using it for classes. We started cutting up all the pieces of plywood we needed according to the plans I had come up with the week before. We just got done before it was time to quit at sunset. Fortunately, Bethany and Liz were nice enough to cook us a good meal which we thoroughly enjoyed. It felt good to go to bed that night!

Elmer was the saw guy. I made the marks. He sawed.
I saw the saw sawing, and saw that he sawed so well.

Ready to put together!

Tuesday we spent assembling our carefully measured and cut plywood pieces. Except for a few fixes here and there, the pieces fit nicely together and our cabinet started to look very nice! And throughout the day, Liz and Bethany brought us drinks and snack much to our satisfaction. After a nice supper again prepared by our thoughtful coworkers, we were able to enjoy some time of relaxation. 

Even though it was dark, I couldn't resist putting a few books into the
cabinet just to see how it would look. I was pleased with the result. :)

On Wednesday, now that the cabinet was finished, I couldn't just let the room disorganized with such a nice place to put everything so I enlisted the help of Liz and Bethany (Elmer had gone home the evening before) to clean it from top to bottom. We started in the morning at around 10 after a nice, long night of rest and got to work. Everything was either moved outside or into the cabinet after which the floor was swept and mopped and only the things we truly wanted was put inside again--this time in an orderly manner! When we were done, somehow the room looked much bigger. We finished around 2:30 (without any lunch, mind you) and then went to Pollo Campero to celebrate a job well done! 

But our day was not done yet. Wednesday is normally church day, but instead we had cleaning day. After another 3 hours of work, we were finally done for the day. Needless to say, we felt a bit tired. However, it was a good feeling of an entire day of hard work. This office boy gained some exercise that day! 

Such a good feeling getting rid of all those boxes!

Nicely organized. We'll see how long it can stay that way!

The rest of week were spent taking it (a bit more) easy and preparing for school the next week. We also planned a special night on Friday to invite Nata's family down for supper. We made chicken, salad, and a how bunch of goodies. Good times...

A picture to send to my family to make them jealous. :)

And that was my week of vacation! So tell me about your weekend... :)

P.S. Thanks so much for praying for me this week. This was one of the best weeks I've had since I came here this year. God is truly at work here and He reminds me again and again and again... Pssst I'll tell you all about that real soon hopefully!

Struggles with the female variety

Clickbait title, right? :)

Be that as it may, in all my prior years here at CICS (two to be exact) it just so happened that I always taught all boys.

Which was great you know. Being one myself, I know more or less what to expect from boys. That's not to say I didn't encounter struggles and problems along the way. Boys are people too, and people have problems--we're not perfect, as much as we like to appear that way. :)

This year I was blessed with a classroom with 75% girls. One boy and three girls. The four most experienced students in school. Just a tad different than before.

I enjoy teaching my class--I truly do. But sometimes stuff comes up and I'm like ok, what do I do now?

Girls 1 and 2 are very good friends and they like to help each other whenever they can, which is what good friends do. No problem with that. But one side effect of that is that girl 3 often gets left to fend for herself. And that is a problem.

Which leads to girl 3 feeling insecure and doing whatever necessary for girls 1 and 2 in order to win some brownie points--like helping on homework and tests even though she knows it's against the rules.

Another challenge I have is maintaining a balance between being a friend and being someone my students can respect. Of course, I always strive to be my students' friend, have fun with them, and to love them regardless of what happens, but sometimes the time comes to stop laughing and correct a problem. Sometimes that means just a small talk, but other times it includes something more serious.

And I don't like doing this. I would much rather be a friend all the time. It's so much easier to look the other way and pretend the incident never happened. This way my students are happy and don't get angry at me, because there's hardly anything worse than to have someone upset at me.

But we all know this will not help anyone in the long run. Sometimes correction is necessary. But hopefully you can see my dilemma.

I guess the purpose of this post is to ask for your prayers--specifically prayers for wisdom. I need lots. Pray that I would be focused on my students' souls (not just on their behavior) and that God could guide me through each day doing whatever needs to be done to help them. Pray that I could have their best interests in mind and that I could come to earn my students' trust and respect.

Thank you so much for praying and God bless y'all for your support!

Elmer hard at work making what has by now become
a tradition on weekends--grilled chicken!

One of these days Miguel should be able to ride
a unicycle without support. But for now he still
hugs the walls. :)

This picture shows the entire girl population at school. They're a bit sparse. :)

Beatriz accused me of eating all the cookies (I do eat a lot). So I told her
that I would help make some to replace the ones I ate.

Either that apron is too short or I am too tall. :)

All done. They were good, too!

The little boys always try to find someone who will
roughhouse with them. So Elmer obliged. 

Not sure what he's doing, but it's funny stuff as always!

Weekend vacation at the guest house!

God is so good

You know the song, right?

God is so good
God is so good
God is so good
He's so good to me...

To be honest, there were a couple of tough times during these last couple days. But somehow, God answered my prayers even beyond my expectations. Let me tell you about all that...

Friday and this Tuesday were test days for the month of February. My students did not do so well. And that's putting it very positively. I'm still learning how to teach older students, so really some of that was my fault. But I was still disappointed. As a result of the bad scores, some of my students had quite a bunch of work to redo! (I make them redo tests that are below 70%)

However, I was able to use their poor test scores as a teaching/preaching opportunity. I told them that if they don't want to redo work and write their vocabulary words over and over and over, it might help if they take some initiative and, you know, study more maybe? Just maybe?

Skip forward to Wednesday, when we had social studies, and all of the students started busily copying down information about Panama from the keynote presentation, without any prodding from me. It would seem they got the message. Success!

Teresa was finally able to come to school again every day this week after battling with some sort of health issues, which I was really thankful for. It's just really unfortunate for a student to miss even one day of school, because there's a lot you can learn in one day. And especially Teresa, because of her great intelligence and willingness to learn (usually).

On Thursday was Bible memory day. Eduardo did much, much better than last time, writing about half of the first four verses of Matthew 5 correctly. He can still improve, sure, but I'll take it considering he only wrote one word last time and even the word he wrote was wrong. :)

Which brings me to one of the toughest experiences this week.

First, let me tell you a bit more about Beatriz and Paola. They are about two years apart with Beatriz being the older of the two. But in spite of being younger than Beatriz, Paola is ahead in school, probably due to coming to CICS when she was younger. The two are good friends, but for some reason I think Paola feels self conscious of being able to learn a bit faster, so she will either help Beatriz during schoolwork or intentionally make mistakes in her own work so she will have the worse score. I've warned the two of them over and over that they need to mind their own business during class, do only their own work, and ask the teacher if they have questions.

On Thursday morning, while writing out the Bible memory verses, the two of them were at it again exchanging signs, but this time teacher Samuel had enough. Time for a practical lesson. When recess came, Beatriz had to start all over, and Paola had to sit right in front of her, resisting the temptation to help in any way. Of course, this didn't suit the two of them, but teacher Samuel meant business, so they obeyed.

I made sure I explained clearly what they had done wrong and made sure they understood. They both said they realized their mistake and confirmed that they had accepted their punishment. Great, right?

Well, not exactly. You see, it just so happens that my students are experts at putting up a facade. So even into the afternoon and the next morning, I could tell that all was not well considering the fact that they barely looked or smiled at me.

I was really dreading school yesterday morning. I wasn't sure how it would go. But I prayed that God would continue to work in my dear students' lives, showing them areas where they could improve, and leading them to repentance.

And would you believe it, during prayer time at the beginning of the school day, Beatriz asked for prayer that she could learn to respect and obey her authorities and learn from her mistakes! I was very pleasantly surprised. How had this change come about?

Later, I expressed my gratefulness to the girls for their change of heart and for being willing to own up to their mistakes and change their attitudes. Beatriz told me she had talked with Paola and Teresa and the two of them had told her that she had made a mistake and that she needs to own up to it and move on.

Positive peer pressure like that was something I had not expected! But regardless, I thanked God for answering my prayers so directly like that.

I learned some things through this. First of all, it was a good reminder that He is still in control. And also, no matter how bad something may seem, God can always turn it around for good!

Please continue praying for these girls and for all the deaf, really. Pray that they would be open to learning from others and from God even when it's a bit humbling.

Pray also for me. I'm still new at this. Pray that I would also be able to learn from others and accept correction. Pray that God would give me lots of wisdom as I attempt to teach my students not only about math and reading, but also about life and the many challenges it brings.

Thanks everyone for your continued support! I appreciate it exceedingly. Here's your weekly dose of pictures. :)

Miguel has no idea what he's doing, but it's still fun!

It was Eduardo's birthday last week!

Kevin got a little dirty during recess I guess, so Beatriz
wanted to help him out a little.

Whenever they get the chance these two will start
wrestling and pummeling each other. Jairo usually
gets the short end of the stick. :)

Mango hunting (and eating).

Liz and Paty take a small break from studying for school to enjoy some
fresh green mangoes.

The unicycles are back!

This is not going to end well...